Never Take Friendship Personal

It's just after 1 a.m. I was checking my Facebook before going to bed. I had checked my message on there and was clicking on a friend's name who had recently sent me a message. She had un-friended me.

The significance of this social blow is unfolded with a short story, but first; an introduction.

I have known this girl for about ten years. I met her when she was about 15. I was the retail manager for High Peak Sportswear in downtown Roanoke. She was brought in by the new retail company-wide manager. Tara was an awkward girl at the time. She was in some ways mature for her age. I enjoyed her company at the store. We had some great conversations and she began to confide in me a little.

On some level I had assumed an older brother position with her. I picked on her, listened to her, and mildly lectured her at times. When I terminated my employment in 2002, I started to lose touch with her.

After my wife left me, I ran in to her a few times downtown. These encounters were friendly, at times harmlessly flirtatious, and always brief. When I found her on Facebook I was pleasantly surprised and we became friends on the site.

I posted a note just the other day thanking several individuals for all of their support and help while I have been going through this. The note was vague and anyone reading it who wasn't one of those people would have no idea what it was about... I'm still not public yet.

Tara sent me a note about one of the names I thanked. She asked if I went to his church and told me to be careful. What was really weird is that she asked if I had changed. I thought it sounded like an odd question. She told me to be careful of what a church might teach me and to listen to myself. I thanked her for her concern. I told her I was more interested in my relationship with God than what a church told me to believe. I even told her that I would be careful. She didn't write back. No big deal.

When I went to click on her name tonight, she had deleted me as a friend. Why?

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It has gotten me worried all over again. I never thought of Tara as hostile toward Christians. She has always seemed so uninvolved spiritually that I didn't think she would care at all. Now I wonder about my other friends. Certainly I have friends who dislike Christianity and Christians more than her. Can I expect similiar reactions from them?

I can't accept that someone could be so petty. I was starting to feel truly confident and empowered. Now I feel somehow threatened. No matter. I will follow God regardless... but I do hate to lose friends over it.